Establishing my negative credentials.
I curse at work, to myself, but loud enough
for everyone to notice. I make fun of ridiculous
rules and sneer at the company dogs I’m
surrounded by.
By implication I mean everyone, because when
I make enemies, I do it whole. And there’s something in me
that needs to flush everything like yesterday’s meat
because once I’ve finally managed to get what I want,
I usually don’t want it.
And I whine like a dog every time, the same way
because nothing is ever right and there’s always
some asshole ready to question everything there
is to question about me. And I get defensive,
and I get indignant and I want to quit and I
want to kill the son of a bitch.
